“Look mommy, a shooting star! If I make a wish now, will it be granted?”
The little girls’ voice sent a jolt through my brain. It seems like yesterday when I uttered those words…truth be told, it was 20 years ago……
It was a cool and clear night. The stars are shining brightly. Mommy was humming softly under the moonlight. I couldn’t remember the tune though. She looked so pretty with the flowery patterned scarf that covers her long black hair, swaying in the gentle breeze. She stopped the swing she was sitting on when she heard the pitter-patter of my footsteps on the pebbled walkway.
“Couldn’t sleep little one?” she asked, smiling sweetly.
I nodded my head.
“Come here.”
She lifted me up and I sat on her lap. She put her arms around me and I snuggled closer to her breast.
“Want to talk about it? You might feel better.”
“I had a bad dream mommy.”
“What about sweetheart?”
“We, me and daddy and you went boating and I fell into the lake. I couldn’t swim mommy. I tried and tried but I keep sinking.”
Tears welled in my eyes.
“Hush sweetie…it’s just a dream. I’m here and I’ll keep you safe. Don’t you worry your little head ok?”
She lifted my chin and planted a warm kiss on my forehead.
“I love you, precious one,” said mommy, her eyes all misty.
I looked into her eyes and to my surprise I saw sadness.
She held me closer. I could feel her body shivering.
Poor mommy, I thought to myself, she must be cold.
“Mommy look! Look! A shooting star!”
My voice must have startled mommy out of her reverie. She looked upward.
“Where? I can’t see it, honey.”
I jumped down from mommy’s lap, head tilted upward, looking for my shooting star.
“Oooh…I see it, I see it,” said mommy. Her face glowed.
“If I make a wish now, will it be granted, mommy?”
Mommy smiled. Her eyes twinkled. “Perhaps. Give it a try.”
I closed my eyes and made my wish. When I opened them, mommy was staring at my face.
“What did you wish for?”
“Wouldn’t it be bad luck if I told you mommy?”
Mommy laughed.
“Bad luck or not it’s not ours to decide, sweetheart. Whatever happens around us is the Almighty’s will, you know. “
“Whatever happens to us is the Almighty’s will….”
That phrase didn’t cross my mind when Mommy passed away 5 years later. I was 15, a rebellious ‘must-have-my-own-way’ teenager. True, I caused Mommy a lot of heartache, but I loved her and still love her dearly. When her body was lowered to the ground, I cried, and cried and blamed God for taking her away from me. Mommy should be with me always…That’s how I want it to be…
“Your mommy is always with you, you know little one.”
That was what my Daddy said at that time.
How could she be here? She’s dead, dead and dead! I screamed silently.
It is the Almighty’s will that I’m here today. It is Almighty’s will that I am without my Mommy. He knows I’m able to cope with life as long as I believe that whatever happens to me is the Almighty’s will.
A deep and meaningful phrase that will guide me and my children throughout our life….